Comments on: Teenagers and Coaching Anger Management

By: Jo Ayoubi

Jo Ayoubi — Tue, 20 May 2008 10:52:17 +0000

It seems to me that alongside the anger management which parents need (there are a lot of pressures on modern parents), what’s also needed is a culture of more assertive parenting.

Many parents these days (OK so that makes me sound old!) seem unable to assertively direct their children, very simply, they can’t say no. Children seem to be growing up in an environment where parents (and teachers) are unable or unwilling to be asssertive with children and to point out when they are behaving inappropriately. Simply put, this results in bad behaviour on the part of the kids, and more frustration for parents.

We will end up with a generation who have only ever been told that everything they do is wonderful, and that nothing they do or say is wrong.

I think this is a lot more dangerous than video games, frankly. It’s the parents who determine what kids watch and play, so…back to assertive parents again!

By: Lois Clymer

Lois Clymer — Mon, 19 May 2008 20:24:20 +0000

Very funny that I should be reading this today, when, this afternoon, my accompanist, whom I’m very fond of, got angry with me. Then this evening, after relating the experience to my husband at dinner, he informed me that I do the same thing. Needless to say, this was not good timing, since I was hoping for support, rather than chastisement. It’s a wonderful example of how we all have different perceptions, and the people who make these nasty games (and gratuitously violent films, I will add) have very different ideas than we do. It seems so obvious, but they have all sorts of reasons, I’m sure, to justify continuing making them: first and foremost, people buy them. All three of your solutions will help. Bon courage!!!

By: Anne Naylor

Anne Naylor — Sat, 17 May 2008 18:51:49 +0000

Learning anger management is a wonderful skill to have. There is another dimension to it I believe which concerns not just self-esteem, or low self-esteem, but children growing up with a strong sense of personal value. That I feel begins in the home. When a person has a core sense that they are loved and valued, their behaviour will be reflected in their value of, and care for, others.

Adults seem to be assuming inordinate pressures – to be seen to be successful; to demonstrate a certain affluence; to be admired and celebrated – external attributes pursued at the expense of peace of mind and real joy in living.

The good news is that there are some remarkable people combining effective living with healthy relationships and personal well-being. So it can be done! But these are not the headline grabbers. You have to look for them and when you find them, they make very reassuring and inspiring reading.